Man Continues to Experience Untimely Life Edgecliff – Local accountant Fred Verlaine woke up today to the sad news of his continued untimely existence. The news that Verlaine, 54, had once again not died in his sleep sent shockwaves through those closest to him, with wife Paula saying: “It’s just so sad that he keeps […]
Man Continues to Experience Untimely Life Read More »
Enmore Man on Holiday Fantasises About Doing “All Manner of Crazy Stuff” While Fitbit Charges Enmore resident Derek Ford, on holiday in Narooma, is positively paralysed with the possibilities of what he can get up to while his Fitbit is charging in his bedroom. High off a trip to Melbourne to see the Australian Cricket
Woman Racking Up Likes on Post Recommending The Social Dilemma Clovelly – Local aromatherapist Sandy Lyle has described Netflix’s trending documentary The Social Dilemma as a ‘must watch’, confirming that posting about it had resulted in unprecedented engagement on all her socials. Speaking to The Dwarf, Lyle said “Yeah look, to be honest, I
Woman Racking Up Likes on Post Recommending The Social Dilemma Read More »
Girlfriend Rejects Challenge to Learn About Turkish Femicide Richmond – Andrew McLennan was shocked today to learn that his girlfriend had no interest in learning about the hashtag that had inspired her latest selfie. McLennan, 27, had been browsing The Guardian during some down time at his job at Mitre 10 when his attention
Girlfriend Rejects Challenge to Learn About Turkish Femicide Read More »
Peter Green Fan Sick of Hearing Go Your Own Way on Pub Jukeboxes Marrickville – Local contrarian Loudon Buckley is already longing for the days of complete lockdown, having heard too many non-Peter Green era Fleetwood Mac songs since returning to pubs. Speaking to The Dwarf from The Vic on the Park, the unemployed
Peter Green Fan Sick of Hearing Go Your Own Way on Pub Jukeboxes Read More »
Ol’ Mate Who had ‘Life-Changing’ Experience in Thailand Still Working in Real Estate Nearly two months after being forced to return from his ‘life-changing’ trip to South-East Asia, sources can confirm that ol’ mate is still working as a real estate agent for Generique Realty. Having fled a bucks week in Pattaya when the Coronavirus
Ol’ Mate Who had ‘Life-Changing’ Experience in Thailand Still Working in Real Estate Read More »
Squatter Possum Proud Owner of Strathfield Garage After Making Significant Improvements In a landmark High Court ruling today, Guinevere D’Possum, a single mother living in the garage of a Strathfield property, is now the proud owner of the former car space. The unanimous ruling took into account a range of issues, including the state the
Squatter Possum Proud Owner of Strathfield Garage After Making Significant Improvements Read More »
Man Trying to Get Laid Concerned About Hidden Agendas St. Peters – In a desperate attempt to impress his virtual date, Eric Vaughan today complained about people with hidden agendas, hoping to convince Cara Neesham to sleep with him. During a hastily arranged Zoom date with his only Tinder match, Vaughan could see her enthusiasm
Man Trying to Get Laid Concerned About Hidden Agendas Read More »
Man Contemplating Taking Relationship with myGov to Next Level Mascot – Recently unemployed man Chris Maguire is starting to develop feelings for myGov, now that they are texting on a daily basis. What started as an innocent first text with a verification code has blossomed into something more meaningful, with Maguire now logging
Man Contemplating Taking Relationship with myGov to Next Level Read More »
Virtual Trivia Host On Notice After First Session Randwick – Local Zoom trivia host Anthony Parker’s new career is in danger of coming to a swift end due to his questions being “fuckin bullshit”. With social circles around the country turning to video conferencing to get their weekly trivia fix, the highly specialised role
Virtual Trivia Host On Notice After First Session Read More »
